I Had to Be Broken to Become Whole

Going down the slide standing up wasn’t my most brilliant moment. 
The girl before me had done it—like a surfer riding a wave. But not me. After a promising start, the toe of my shoe caught on something and down I went, landing at the bottom of the slide in a heap. 

Gasping for air from having the breath out of me, I lifted my arm. It was bent at a strange angle and already beginning to swell. I cradled it to my chest and stumbled to the playground monitor. An x-ray later confirmed the doctor’s suspicions—two broken bones. 

“I’m going to have to set it,” he said, “and it’s going to hurt. But only for a moment.” He lowered himself until he was eye-level with my frightened face. “If I don’t set it, the bones will grow back crooked, and you’ll never be able to use your arm. Do you understand?” 

I nodded a tearful yes. 

Taking my skinny arm gently in his hands and glancing long at the x-ray plastered onto the light box, he paused. Maybe he said a prayer. I don’t know. Then, swiftly and smoothly, he pulled the two parts of my broken arm in place. 

I screamed and crumpled into a sobbing ball on the table. 

I thought about this experience recently when I read Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your path straight.” 

The Latin word for straight is orthos. From this root we get the English word “orthopedic,” which means to make children’s (ped) bones straight. This is what the doctor did for me when I was seven years old. 

Proverbs 3:5-6 describes what God wants to do for me every day—to make the path of my life straight. 

Before he intervened, I was broken and crippled by sin. Paralyzed by fear. Empty and dissatisfied. At 18 years old, I surrendered my will to his. Through the miracle of grace through faith—a precious gift of God—I believed. I flung my whole self on him with no holding back. 

“I’ve been living my life my way,” I prayed, “and I’ve been doing a terrible job. I don’t want to be in charge any more. I want you to direct my paths.” My will was broken—in a painfully wonderful way. 

Wonder of wonder, God heard the prayer of my heart that day and began to transform me. I wish, like the orthopedist, he had given one pull and straightened out everything in my life, but spiritual breaks don’t heal like that. 

Instead, as I read God’s Word and learned to recognize and obey the Holy Spirit’s voice, my twisted path grew less convoluted. The Bible provided direction and helped me make good choices. Wise counselors shared insight and experience. Mentors guided me. I began to fulfill God’s purpose for me—to bring him glory. 

Sanctification—becoming more like Jesus—has continued to be painful at times. 

Doing the right thing can be unpopular. Sometimes it’s embarrassing. Other times it’s expensive. It’s cost me relationships, jobs, and opportunities. 

But oh, the joy of following Jesus. Of trusting his perfect way instead of my flawed and frail one. Of walking in confidence, knowing that as I commit my way to him, he will make my path straight. 

I’m thankful for physicians who know how to set broken arms and help them heal. I’m even more thankful for God, the Great Physician, who knows how to straighten our sin-twisted souls and make them whole. 

What a miracle. 

What a gift. 

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